chain letter

the chain letter is in the quotes. my comments are not

YEAR:

2029

“Ozone created by electric cars now killing millions in the seventh largest country in the world, Mexifornia , former ly known as California. White minorities still trying to have English recognized as Mexifornia's third language.”

Assuming California secedes and gets away with it, why would English be the 3rd language and not the 2nd? (assuming the Latino community, who the majority of which speak English, would change the official language to Spanish.)


“Spotted Owl plague threatens northwestern United States crops and livestock.”

22 years isn’t enough to take a creature from near-brink extinction to eccesive commodity

“Baby conceived naturally. Scientists stumped.”

At least, they would be if babies in the past were not conceived naturally. If these “scientists” are stumped by this in 22 years, I’d say we should all personally pummel them.

“ Couple petitions court to reinstate heterosexual marriage.”

What was in place before that? gay marriage? Considering that gay marriage is outlawed in all states minus 1, if it managed to not only become instated in the US in 22 years but manage to in fact ban heterosexual marriage, America really is the red neck country of the western world and I’d be living in Canada.

“Last remaining Fundamentalist Muslim dies in the AmericanTerritory of the Middle East (formerly known as Iraq, Afghanistan, Syria and Lebanon). “

What happened to Egypt, Jordan, Saudi Arabia, Yemen, Oman, Turkey, and Iran? Did we bomb the $#@! out of them and are no longer existing?

“Iran still closed off; physicists estimate it will take at least 10 more years before radioactivity decreases to safe levels.”

That explains why 1 of the countries was missing form the list.

“France pleads for global help after being taken over by Jamaica.”

Their bobsled team was very formidable.

“Castro finally dies at age 112; Cuban cigars can now be imported legally, but President Chelsea Clinton has banned all smoking.”

Fidel Castro was born in 1929, effectively making him 103 years old, not 112. (Unless he masted time magic, which would explain why he managed to outlive all other Cubans before him.)

“George Z. Bush says he will run for President in 2036.”

That is just what America needs.

“Postal Service raises price of first class stamp to $17.89 and reduces mail delivery to Wednesdays only.”

Unless we run into some bull$#@! inflation, I highly doubt you’d pay more than $1 for a stamp.(assuming rates increase at an average pace(considering from 65-85 we have a 400% increase, as opposed to just a mere 100% increase between 85 and now, we can expect a 175% increase over 20 years due to various unfavorable economic factors.) It took 20 years for rates to double (from 22 cents in 85 to 41 cents in 07)

“85-year $75.8 billion study: Diet and Exercise is the key to weight loss.”

I highly doubt anyone is currently taking part in a diet study that would last their entire lives. If they’re using different people in each decade, then the numbers are invalid.

“Average weight of Americans drops to 250 lbs.”

And it only took me 22 years to become below average.

“Japanese scientists have created a camera with such a fast shutter speed, they now can photograph a woman with her mouth shut.”

Haha. But I call bull. Their mouths are never closed. Even asleep, they’re still talking.

“Massachusetts executes last remaining conservative.”

Why would a highly liberal state even consider executing people? More like ‘Mass. liberals abort last remaining conservative baby” now that would be more believable.

“Supreme Court rules punishment of criminals violates their civil rights.”

If such were the case, they’d also rule that all Americans are guilty of some crime. Inconceivable? When was the last time you downloaded music or took something that didn’t belong to you, or threatened someone? Yeah, thought so.