Metaphors and Similies

I might not be good at metaphors, but I am funny and that’s what really counts. Hopefully I’ll get a good grade based on that.



Going on a blind date is like – Christmas

Christmas is like – Going on a blind date

A tall, cold glass of water after a hot day is – like a hot cup of cocoa on a cold winder morning

My brother plays basketball like – a white guy

He looked in his mailbox as if – he was expecting something.

He dealt out poker chips like a – douchebag.

The old man next door is – crazy.

My girlfriend is like – totally cheating on me.

The group of women sitting at the far table in the restaurant chattered like – a group of women sitting at the far table in the restaurant chattering.

Eating at that Restaurant is – hell because there’s a group of women sitting at the far table chattering.

I laughed pretty hard

"So what, the CELL is better at ray tracing. Is that enough to make a video game with superb visuals? NOPE"

Oh the irony.

"But hey look at the bright side, nothing can beat $170 million first day man."
"Yeah because when you console goes the best thing to cheer you up is how much money bungie and microsoft are rolling around in."

"Remember in the '90s when we used to joke around about what would happen if Microsoft made a car? Remember that? And how the car would basically kill anyone who drove it? Does anyone else remember that? Because that's exactly what the Xbox 360 is like."

Verbatim Quotes from Republicans when Clinton was Prez.Verbatim Quotes from Republicans when Clinton was Prez.

From here

I find it odd the Republicans had a different message when Clinton was President:
KY's Senior Senator Mitch McConnell said during a speech on the floor of the U.S. Senate
"Domestic terrorism is not a cause we have to fight or a project we need to fund. We are not interested in capturing bin Laden. Even though he has been offered to us. We are not the world's policemen. It's not our job to clean up other countries messes or arrest it's bad guys."

VERBATIM QUOTES FROM WHEN CLINTON WAS COMMITTING TROOPS TO BOSNIA:

"You can support the troops but not the president."--Rep Tom Delay (R-TX)
"Well, I just think it's a bad idea. What's going to happen is they're going to be over there for 10, 15, maybe 20 years."--Joe Scarborough (R-FL)

"Explain to the mothers and fathers of American servicemen that may come home in body bags why their son or daughter have to give up their life?"--Sean Hannity, Fox News, 4/6/99

"[The] President . . . is once again releasing American military might on a foreign country with an ill-defined objective and no exit strategy. He has yet to tell the Congress how much this operation will cost. And he has not informed our nation's armed forces about how long they will be away from home. These strikes do not make for a sound foreign policy."--Sen. Rick Santorum (R-PA)"

American foreign policy is now one huge big mystery. Simply put, the administration is trying to lead the world with a feel-good foreign policy."--Rep Tom Delay (R-TX)

"If we are going to commit American troops, we must be certain they have a clear mission, an achievable goal and an exit strategy."
--Karen Hughes, speaking on behalf of George W Bush

"I had doubts about the bombing campaign from the beginning . . I didn't think we had done enough in the diplomatic area."--Senator Trent Lott (R-MS)

"I cannot support a failed foreign policy. History teaches us that it is often easier to make war than peace. This administration is just learning that lesson right now. The President began this mission with very vague objectives and lots of unanswered questions. A month later, these questions are still unanswered. There are no clarified rules of engagement. There is no timetable. There is no legitimate definition of victory. There is no contingency plan for mission creep. There is no clear funding program. There is no agenda to bolster our over-extended military. There is no explanation defining what vital national interests are at stake. There was no strategic plan for war when the President started this thing, and there still is no plan today"--Rep Tom Delay (R-TX)

"Victory means exit strategy, and it's important for the President to explain to us what the exit strategy is."-- Governor George W. Bush (R)-TX

O.I.L.

On the Iraq War

TheSkinsFactory


The war is about Peak Oil and securing our national security since if we have no oil, we plunge back into the stone age. It's also about petrol dollars and how Saddam switched to the euro for oil payments. It's also to weaken OPEC. There's so many reasons we're there and not one of them is about terror. If you've being watching the news lately, guess who else wants to switch to euros for oil payments... Iran. Wonder where we're going to strike next?

doomrat

It would be if people still paid attention to the truth. But it's been years since that's happened.
Jesus Christ could ride a unicorn down a rainbow into the Superbowl halftime game, announce that Saddam did NOT blow up the WTC and the majority of American conservatives would all be like, 'that Jesus...such a kidder!'
Look around...people don't buy the truth like they used to. I blame fast food additives and fructose corn syrup.

Why We Must Leave Iraq

From The Nation

As Congress gathers to hear the reports of Gen. David Petraeus and Ambassador Ryan Crocker, no amount of Administration spin can hide the ugly reality in Iraq. A surge that should never have been tried and that could never have succeeded has predictably failed. While violence in some parts of Baghdad has declined to June 2006 levels, the number of deaths from political violence has increased in Iraq as a whole. Ethnic cleansing has proceeded apace, and the humanitarian catastrophe, already staggering, has worsened. Some 2.5 million Iraqis are now refugees in neighboring countries. Another 2 million are internally displaced. And despite Bush Administration claims to the contrary, most of Iraq's cities and towns still lack regular electricity, sanitation and other basic services, and suffer from economic depression. Up to half of Iraqis are unemployed.

The stated purpose of the surge was to create enough security in and around Baghdad to give Iraqi politicians breathing room to pursue reconciliation. But with the exception of some very minor recent concessions on de-Baathification, the Shiite-led government has stuck to positions that have prevented most Sunnis from participating in the government. Moreover, it is increasingly difficult to speak of an Iraqi government that has power or authority outside Baghdad's Green Zone. Real power resides with the militias on the ground, which are competing for resources and influence throughout much of Iraq. Even within the Green Zone, some seventeen ministries have withdrawn their support from the government and increasingly act as independent fiefdoms handing out resources to loyal constituents.

The surge has done nothing to change this--in large part because the United States, despite its sizable military and substantial economic largesse, is powerless to coerce or cajole change in the centers of power. Any gains the surge has produced may be gone tomorrow, like a footprint washed away by the tide.

The surge has thus been a cruel hoax on the American people and on our servicemen and -women (more than 600 of whom have been killed and 4,000 injured since the surge was announced). It is yet another Administration bid to stave off public pressure to withdraw and thus to avoid admitting failure. This irresponsibility--this morally indefensible sacrifice of American and Iraqi lives in pursuit of unachievable goals--must end. The Iraq War has long been lost, and it is time to bring it to a close. We continue to believe that a complete withdrawal of US forces, carried out as quickly as possible, is the best course of action for the United States, Iraq and the region.

The question before Congress and the nation should not be whether to give the surge more time but how best to end the occupation. So far the Administration has been able to thwart Congressional efforts to force a withdrawal--first with the surge and now with its dire warnings of a disaster in store for Iraq, the region and US interests if we withdraw. Also troubling, several Democratic presidential candidates seem to have bought into these worst-case scenarios and have begun to slow their timetable for withdrawal, adding new conditions for a pullout. Some are even calling for keeping a sizable residual force in Iraq or neighboring countries indefinitely. Congress must resist White House claims about the surge's "success" and deny additional funds for the occupation, instead pursuing reconciliation and reconstruction, at home and abroad. As the Administration presses its PR offensive for an extended surge and open-ended occupation, it is critically important that we let our representatives know we're fed up with the war and want the troops home--now. Otherwise, Congress is unlikely to buck White House pressure.

Those who support a residual US force in Iraq argue that a complete withdrawal would hamper our ability to deter Al Qaeda attacks, sectarian atrocities and regional war. We believe that any good accomplished by a residual US force would be outweighed by the harm it would do.

Consider the question of Al Qaeda in Mesopotamia, which at most has a few thousand fighters. Local Sunni groups tolerated them in the past because they were allies against the occupation. Now that the Sunni tribes expect a US withdrawal, they have begun to turn against Al Qaeda. And if the Sunnis aren't able to eliminate the jihadis, the Shiites and the Kurds will, with the blessing if not the outright help of neighboring countries like Syria, Turkey and Iran, which do not want Al Qaeda to gain a foothold in the area. And as regional expert Flynt Leverett has pointed out, conventional ground troops are useless for counterterrorism missions. A residual force in Iraq (or in neighboring Kuwait) would further inflame popular opinion against the United States in the Arab and Muslim worlds and be a boon to jihadi recruitment.

As for intervening to stop sectarian atrocities, US military forces in much larger numbers have not been able to stop the violence that has claimed nearly 2,000 Iraqis a month or to prevent the ethnic cleansing that has displaced millions. It is not clear why a smaller force would be any more effective. The sad fact is that much of the ethnic cleansing has already taken place--on our watch. To be sure, a US withdrawal may lead to an intensification of the civil war, as different factions make a grab for power. But stability among these factions can be established only after a US withdrawal. Indeed, any US forces will be destabilizing because one group or another will try to draw them into the battle on their side. Only after we commit to a complete withdrawal will there be any hope of international mediation and a lasting settlement based on a balance of forces not subject to US favoritism and power maneuvers, suspected or real.

As to the concern that a complete withdrawal will lead to regional war, as different countries intervene in Iraq's civil war: This is a naïvely self-centered view of the Middle East and its problems. For all its democratic and human rights shortcomings, the region is resilient and capable of managing conflict. It survived fifteen years of civil war in Lebanon and almost a decade of brutal war between Iran and Iraq. It will survive the withdrawal of US forces from Iraq. It was the Saudis and Syrians who in 1989 brokered an end to the war in Lebanon, not us. And Iran, Syria and Saudi Arabia have the greatest stake in keeping the Iraqi conflict contained and therefore can be counted on to control their allies in Iraq once US forces withdraw.

More important, a commitment to a complete US withdrawal would open the way for international mediation and peacekeeping efforts, under the auspices of the United Nations, the Arab League or the Organization of the Islamic Conference. Indeed, it may be the only way to develop a regional concert of powers that can work with Iraqis to stabilize the country and control the conflict. Only by removing US forces and ending all claims to permanent bases can Washington increase the possibility that other countries will assist Iraq. The best way to prevent regional destabilization is to refocus our regional efforts and help Iraq and its neighbors cope with the humanitarian crisis we helped create. We can begin by helping to organize assistance for Syria, Jordan and Lebanon to resettle their Iraqi refugees. We can press Gulf countries like Kuwait and Saudi Arabia not to buy US weapons and host US troops but to open their doors to their Iraqi neighbors. And we can talk with Syria and Iran about our common interest in an Al Qaeda-free region instead of threatening to overthrow their governments.

Not only is withdrawing from Iraq in our national interest; it is also the moral, responsible thing to do. There is one way to atone for our illegal invasion and reckon with the human catastrophe our occupation has caused: End the occupation and abandon the pretense that only American power can bring order and democracy to the region. Then there will be a fair test of the Iraqis' willingness to settle their differences and of the international community's ability to assist them. And then we will be able to prove our nonimperial claims and play a constructive role in the region and world.

Ron Paul on Fox News Debate

I'm converted. Obama Paul 08!

Talking About Lincoln

Michael: yeah, everyone knows that, I'm just saying that at the time he was rather unpopular. I mean look at the civil war me: inevitable it's not like the southern sentiments came out of nowhere it was there for quite some time Michael: yeah, but certain states were pretty pissed with him I'm not saying that he was a bad or unlikeable guy, I'm just saying he didn't rub everyone the right way me: well, he wasn't a prostitute, so he didn't need to

Writing

Experience:
Considering the inane fact that the graduation requirements for students in Hawaii includes 4 years of English, I have ample experience in writing (albeit not very well, though above par when compared to my peers). Add to that my two semesters I took in Creative Writing and I should be considered a genius by Hawaii standards. My fondest memories are from my Creative Writing class. Though we wrote poetry, short stories and journals, the high light of the class was watching semi-popular movies and writing our reflections on what we watched. I always knew that those countless hours spent in front of the TV during my childhood years would come in handy. And my parents said that it would amount to nothing.

Most Influential Teacher:
My favorite teacher had to be Mrs Jackson. Unlike the other teachers whose standards are rooted in tradition which stifles creativity, Mrs Jackson allowed me to write however I felt like. So, instead of my essays being boring like “The rose bush represents blah, blah, blah. The author thought this, that and that over there” and more like “The rose bush totally represents contemporary America and the author thought that these people were douchebags for not taking care of it.” Although I should mention that I never managed to get an A on an essay.

Writing Process:
I usually get writing ideas and inspiration from my head. I don’t know what big name authors get their ideas from, I suspect they steal them because they always claim to get their inspiration from someone else, like their moms.

The conditions in which I write in are very specific. The room must be dark, with a single candle, lit, on the table. It must be a full moon, but not too full. I must be wearing my cloak of awesomeness and my +10 hat of creativity. Of course, I’m just kidding. I usually write whenever I feel like it, which tends to be later in the day, since I have school and work in the morning. Also, because my writing is atrocious, a computer is essential.

I rarely revise a piece of my writing for one simple reason: I am perfect. On that ever-so-rare occasion I do need to edit, I will blame it on my muse, because, lets face it, it was her fault to begin with. And yes, my muse is female.

Also, I only work under deadlines when I’m writing for someone else. You can’t force inspiration and genius. It comes naturally.

Good writers:
Good writers must have a good imagination. English skills aren’t as important because any smart writer will just have their editor fix their mistakes for them. If your brain is defected and you are unable to imagine, then at least be sure you’re a genius. That way, even though the world of fiction is forever beyond your grasp, you can always fall back on non-fiction. I used to have an optimistic view about people and their writings. Then I discovered their blogs and have been a pessimist ever since. Seriously people, no one cares if you ate a sandwich, no one cares what kind of sandwich is was and we really could careless about who you think is cute or which teacher you despise with every fiber of your being. Now go cut yourself.

Favorite Writer:
My favorite writer is, of course, me. I am my own best fan. (And no, I’m not the only one) If I ever found someone who wrote as well as me or better, I’m marry her* (*Only applicable to females. Sorry guys.). My second favorite writer is Dave Barry whose flair for humor seems to exceed my own.

What would you like to learn:
If at all possible, I would like to learn nothing this semester and yet still receive an A.

Democracy index

From the Economist
1. Sweden
2. Iceland
3. Netherlands
4. Norway
5. Denmark
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-
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16. Spain 8.34
17. US 8.22
18. Czech Republic 8.17
19. Portugal 8.16
20. Belgium & Japan 8.15
22. Greece 8.13
23. UK 8.08
24. France 8.07
25. Mauritius & Costa Rica 8.04

"Somehow, "we're number seventeen!" just doesn't have the same ring to it..."- felchdonkey

"In your face Czech Republic!!!!"- AxeSwinger

"'Bush should invite Swedes over to teach the worlds' greatest country how to be a democracy ;o)'

By invite do you mean invade?" - abid786

" the US isn't in the top ten because we're busy exporting democracy. another top export is freedom."- pintomp3

Taliban thanks South Korea for $20 million, will use it for terrorism

" they would have wasted the money on Starcraft 2 anyway" - hbeierg